I had a strange experience last week and I'm finally ready to blog about it. I live about 12 miles from where I work. My school is in a cute, nice neighborhood surrounded by a farmer's market, a Panera, a nice gourmet food and liquor store, and other niceties. I live south of this area and daily I drive through an area that is struggling economically. I realize that this area has seen gentrification, so I've always made a point to patronize these businesses despite the drug and crime reputation it has.
Last week, I stopped and decided to get a pizza for dinner. I parked in a drug store parking lot, got out the baby, walked to the pizza place, and ordered my pizza. Mark and I then walked over to the drug store and shopped while the pizza was being made. I finished shopping, put the bags in my trunk, and walked back to get my pizza. I waited for a bit once I got inside and made small talk with the lady in line in front of me. She and I chatted about kids, and all of a sudden one of the employees came around the counter to hand me the pizza. Meanwhile, she walked out. As I left, pizza in one hand, baby and purse in the other, I saw the lady talking with a man underneath the sign for the pizza place.
I walked back to my car, put the pizza and my purse in the front seat, closed the door, and began putting Mark in his carseat. You know when you can tell you're being watched and/or someone is approaching you from behind? I got a strong sense of that as I finished buckling Mark in, so I quickly finished and shut the door. As I stood up, the lady I had spoken to previously was right there and the man she'd been talking to was watching her and I from across the parking lot. Freaked me out. She told me that she was homeless and that the pizza place gives out messed-up pizzas to the homeless but that they didn't have any at this time. She didn't have anything to eat. At this point, I begin offering the pizza. She went on with her plea and I continued offering (probably sounding like an idiot-- It's a large! It's got everything on it!).
She finally took the pizza and she hugged me. I hustled my behind out of there.
On my way home, I was still freaked out. I was angry that I'd lost my dinner (I stopped and got a pizza for a reason). I felt violated and threatened. Yes, I offered up the pizza. But when a lady with broken front teeth comes up from behind me while I'm securing my 16-month old and she has a male acquaintance watching nearby, I'm feeling vulnerable.
I'm now ticked. I feel like I got hustled. I'm not going back into that area, especially because this all happened in broad daylight, at about 5:00 P.M. I don't feel safe there.
The scary thing is that it could have been much, much worse.
What do you think?
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2 comments:
From klugula...
I get asked for money at least once a day, here in Chicago. I never feel threatened or strange...but I assume you don't get that as much where you are. I'm not trying to downplay it, but if you get it daily, it doesn't feel so strange. I give money sometimes, and sometimes I don't. I've purchased an extra water bottle on a day when it was pushing 100 degrees; to give to the woman always outside the Walgreen's. She didn't accept, but was grateful. I guess I wouldn't take it too much to heart; this whole ordeal. You did a good thing, but have to be more sensible about where you are; especially w/ your child. You have a big heart, but once you feel odd; you should pay more attention to that; than what you feel you need to do to "give back". Bottom line; I guess follow your gut.
When I am out and about, I've been approached, and I'm fine with that. There were a few factors that made me feel vulnerable and weird about this situation. I was a) followed across a parking lot, b) approached from behind while I was busy snapping Mark in, and c) there was a man watching the interaction between the woman and I, and d) they waited until I was alone and outnumbered to approach me. I'm fine with panhandlers, but this was different. You're right, I should be more careful-- but I do feel sad about not feeling safe enough to patronize businesses in an area that is struggling.
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